I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
