Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Randomize
