If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Randomize
