life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Randomize
