Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
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