Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
You were trust falling into bushes
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
