these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
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