I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Everything about him screamed your future.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
I FOUND THE LEGS
Randomize
