I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
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