you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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