if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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