One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
