Fuck appropriateness.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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