just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize
