I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
