im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
