D3 body, D1 cock
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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