id be glad to
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
We had to coat check the pizza.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
