I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
