Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
