that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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