So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
