I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
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