WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
