And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
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