no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Randomize
