Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
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