i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
