you guys were way drunker than both of me
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Randomize
