You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
Randomize
