im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Randomize
