i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
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