After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Randomize
