when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
