I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
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