I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
