I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Randomize
