I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Randomize
