So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
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