am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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