your thong is hanging out like whoa
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
is that a dick in a sweater?
Randomize
