I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
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