allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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