I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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