you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Randomize
