yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
Randomize
