VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
I feel like death gave me a hand job
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
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