question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
he fucked my hip out of place.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
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