Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
