I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Randomize
